A NOTE BEFORE YOU WATCH
This conversation includes discussion of suicide and suicidal thoughts. If you or someone you know needs immediate support, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Please take care of yourself—and take care of your athlete.
The Signs We Don't Always See
Before Sarah Shulze was a Division I runner, she was a daughter, a sister, a friend, an adventurer and a young woman who wanted to make a difference.
That is where her mother, Brigitte Shulze, wants her story to begin.
Sarah was the oldest of three girls—funny, goofy, fiercely determined and endlessly curious. She loved reading, travel and adventure. On a family trip to Africa, she convinced much of her family to swim to Devil's Pool at the edge of Victoria Falls. After meeting a safari guide working to save elephants from poachers, Sarah returned home and organized her own fundraiser.
Years later, she discovered another passion in politics and public service, working for a Wisconsin state senator and serving as a poll worker. Brigitte remembers Sarah being every bit as proud of those accomplishments as anything she achieved as an athlete.
Running wasn't even the obvious beginning.
Sarah tried soccer and dance before finding a sport that rewarded something she understood instinctively: if she showed up, practiced and worked hard, she could get better.
She did.
Sarah developed into an accomplished high-school runner at Oak Park High School in California, eventually winning CIF championships and earning the opportunity to compete at the University of Wisconsin.
But her athletic journey wasn't without difficulty. A stress fracture during her freshman year of high school temporarily took away the sport and team she had been so eager to join. Brigitte remembers Sarah continuing to attend practice and ride a stationary bike simply to remain connected to her teammates. Her coaches were patient with her recovery—even when Sarah herself wanted to return faster.
At Wisconsin, the environment changed quickly.
The women's coach Sarah expected to run for left shortly after she arrived. A replacement brought a very different dynamic. College running also meant moving nearly continuously from cross country to indoor track to outdoor track while balancing academics and travel.
Then COVID changed everything again.
When Sarah returned home, Brigitte and her husband Scott could see anxiety in their daughter more clearly. At Wisconsin, distance had made some of those changes harder to recognize.
COVID also gave Sarah something unexpected: the opportunity to intern for a Wisconsin state senator while remaining a full-time student-athlete. For perhaps the first time in college, she could experience an identity that wasn't centered on running.
But when competition resumed, that opportunity ended.
As the pressures around Sarah increased, Brigitte and Scott tried to understand what was happening from thousands of miles away.
They weren't mental-health experts. They were parents trying to read their child.
And Sarah could be difficult to read from far away.
Brigitte remembers a young woman who presented herself as confident and independent—someone who appeared to have everything under control—even while holding much more inside.
All you can really do is go on your gut instinct of what you know about your child. And the hard part about Sarah was she put on a very confident front.
Sometimes the answer her parents received was simply:
"I'm fine."
Brigitte now understands how difficult those words can be for a parent, particularly from a distance. Standing in front of her daughter, she could look into Sarah's eyes. Through a text message, those same instincts were much harder to use.
By Sarah's junior year, pressures were converging.
Let me look in your eyes when you say you're fine, and I can tell if you're having a problem. But if it's just coming through text, that's a little harder. You can't read between the lines with 'fine.'
The team had experienced significant coaching turmoil. Sarah was struggling with uncertainty around competition. A relationship with another athlete was deteriorating. And shortly before a meet in Arizona that her family planned to attend, Sarah unexpectedly learned she would not be traveling with the team.
The following morning, amid the breakup and everything surrounding it, Sarah told her mother:
"Mom, I want to transfer."
Looking back, Brigitte hears those words differently than she did that day.
She and Scott stayed in contact with Sarah, talked through what was happening and encouraged her to reconnect with her therapist. Sarah told her mother she would get out of the house and attend an appointment with her academic adviser.
The final text Brigitte received from Sarah ended:
"I'm fine."
Sarah was 21 when she left us.
Know what the mental health plan is. And if you're talking about athletics, what role does the parent have?
But this conversation does not define Sarah by the way her life ended.
It asks us first to understand who she was—the daughter, sister, friend, student, advocate and athlete—and then to consider what her experience can teach the adults responsible for supporting young people through sports.
Brigitte now encourages families to ask questions she never imagined needing to ask.
What mental-health resources exist? Who does an athlete turn to when they're struggling? What does a coach know? What role does a parent have? And if something goes wrong, is there actually a plan?
Those questions are part of Sarah's story now.
And in Part 2, Brigitte returns to share what her family has done with them—including the creation of the Sarah Shulze Foundation and the work that led to Sarah Shulze's Law.
Top 5 Takeaways
KNOW THE PERSON BEHIND THE ATHLETE.
Sarah wasn't simply a runner. She was a daughter, sister, friend, adventurer, student and advocate with interests and ambitions beyond competition. As sports become more demanding, parents can help young athletes preserve the other parts of themselves.
PAY ATTENTION TO CHANGES, NOT JUST CRISES.
Injury. Coaching changes. Team dynamics. Academic demands. Relationships. Isolation. Performance pressure. Any one may be manageable. But circumstances can accumulate, and parents should pay attention when the child they know begins behaving differently.
"I'M FINE" DOESN'T ALWAYS END THE CONVERSATION.
Older athletes need independence, particularly when they leave home. That doesn't mean parents stop observing, listening or trusting what they know about their child. Sometimes a short answer—especially from a distance—doesn't reveal everything happening underneath.
KNOW THE SUPPORT SYSTEM BEFORE YOUR ATHLETE NEEDS IT.
Parents routinely investigate coaches, facilities, scholarships, academics and athletic opportunities. Mental-health support deserves the same due diligence. Know what resources exist, how athletes access them, who is responsible when concerns arise and how families fit into that system.
HELP YOUR ATHLETE BUILD A LIFE BIGGER THAN SPORTS.
Sarah's internship gave her an opportunity to experience herself outside of running. Other interests, relationships and ambitions don't distract from being an athlete. They can help a young person build an identity that isn't dependent entirely on performance.
