A PARENT'S PERSPECTIVE
I did not know what anxiety looked like when it first entered our family’s sports experience. What I saw looked like a performance problem, so I went looking for performance help.
One of my daughters experienced vocal cord dysfunction, which in her case was connected to anxiety — and we did not recognize where it was coming from at first. That experience changed the way I think about what parents may be seeing.
Anxiety may not always show up in a way a parent immediately recognizes. Paying attention to changes in how your child is acting from day to day or week to week can be an important part of supporting their mental health.
What sports parents should know
- Anxiety can look different from what a parent expects.
- A change in behavior or a physical symptom can deserve closer attention.
- Observation and education can help parents respond with more understanding.
YOUR HAPPY MOMENT
Pay attention to changes, not just performance. If something feels different with your child, get curious about what may be happening beyond the game.
Trusted resources
Disclaimer
The Valiant Parent reflects Todd Merkow’s personal perspective as a former sports parent, including lessons learned and things he might approach differently looking back. It is intended to help parents think, ask questions and find trusted information—not to provide medical or mental health advice. When a child’s physical or emotional well-being is a concern, parents should seek guidance from an appropriate qualified professional.
Original transcript
I didn't know what anxiety looked like. I had no clue. But when it crept in, what I saw was somebody who needed help from a sports performance perspective, and I sought to bring the wrong experts into the mix. One of my daughters experienced a symptom called vocal cord dysfunction, which is anxiety-driven, and we never had any idea that that was where it was coming from. So, education on understanding what anxiety can look like in its many forms, and being very observant of your kids and how they're acting, and any changes that might occur day to day, week to week, is really critical for managing mental health.